


Ethereal

by Cerianex



Category: Haikyuu!!, Kagehina - Fandom
Genre: Anal, Anal Fingering, Anal Sex, Blowjobs, Bottom Hinata Shouyou, Emotional Hurt, Fluff, Fluff and Smut, Hinata Shouyou is Sunshine, Hurt Hinata Shouyou, Implied/Referenced Self-Harm, KageHina - Freeform, Kageyama Tobio is Bad at Feelings, M/M, Mild Hurt/Comfort, Oral Sex, Protective Kageyama Tobio, Scars, Self-Harm, Smut, hinata is growing as a person, hinata shouyou - Freeform, kageyama tobio - Freeform
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-03-05
Updated: 2021-03-08
Packaged: 2021-03-18 02:07:57
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 3
Words: 4,427
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29850948
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Cerianex/pseuds/Cerianex
Summary: Hinata is overcoming his weaknesses in life, growing as a person and becoming a better version of himself. He hasn't seen Kageyama since graduation four years ago, and the ginger misses him greatly. But one day, Kageyama stumbles back into his life and Hinata finds the raven to be the one thing that holds him together. He loves Kageyama, and he hopes he never leaves his side again.OR: Hinata and Kageyama find each other again and go on dates - there's smut
Relationships: Hinata Shouyou/Kageyama Tobio
Kudos: 34





	1. Chapter 1

Hinata’s eyes shot open, scanning the familiar white walls of his bedroom and forcing himself back to reality and out of his dream-like state from slumber. The ginger yawned, stretching his arms up high above his head before forcing himself out of his warm, comfy sheets. He didn’t quite remember what he was dreaming of, although he had a feeling it was unpleasant, given the amount of sweat he noticed coating his back. Hinata brushed it off, not caring enough to remember. He walked across the hall and into the bathroom, locking the door behind him. He pulled his white hoodie over his head and glanced at himself in the mirror. The familiar red and white lacerations stared back at him. Hinata’s eyes travelled across his textured skin, examining each scar and remembering the worst point in his life when he had resorted to such a thing. He traced them with his fingers, feeling every part and, as per morning routine, feeling absolutely disgusted with himself. He wished he hadn’t been so stupid. He wished he hadn’t done something so permanent and unforgiving. Because of his decisions in that dark time, he would bare these scars for the rest of his life. The ginger sighed, bringing his hands up to comb through his messy hair. However much it pained him to see them, he knew in a way, it was proof. The white scars were proof that he hadn’t cut in a long time and would never cut again. The wounds were healed over, and Hinata would never find comfort in cutting again, as he swore it. He remembered when his mother saw them for the first time. He had been reckless. He stole his mother’s pack of razor blades and hid them in his room that night. After dinner, his mother went to take a shower and searched everywhere for them. When she couldn’t find the box, she barged into Hinata’s room, where he had been kneeling on the ground, slicing away at his wrists with a bloody rag held tightly to his skin. His mother had never cried so hard, nor had she ever asked so many questions, all of which Hinata had no answers. Hinata himself didn’t quite know why. All he knew was that at that time, it was so much easier to focus on the physical pain than the pain he felt inside. Hinata shook the memories away, turning from the mirror and pulling the rest of his clothes off and hopping in the shower.

Around noon, Hinata waved goodbye to his little sister and mother before heading off to work.  
He spent the first few hours of his shift decorating cakes and baking loafs of bread and pastries, given he worked at the small bakery down the street. Today, he found himself reminiscing of his high school days and his volleyball teammates. He missed them, and he missed volleyball. He missed the friendships, and most of all, he missed Kageyama. Hinata hadn’t realized he had feelings for his teammate until they had graduated and Kageyama had moved away for college somewhere in Washington. Every day after that was spent thinking about the raven-haired boy, what he was doing and when he would see him again. He felt nothing but regret for not telling him how he felt when he had the chance. Hinata had tried reaching out once or twice, but never got a response. He figured it wasn’t meant to be, and tried his best to forget about him.  
One by one, all of his friends disappeared after graduating, either moving away or becoming far too busy with work to keep any friendships alive. It saddened Hinata more often than he’d like to admit. Although that was only the beginning of his downward spiral. Having no friends and no one to talk to was only the beginning of his hardships, and it would have been helpful if he had someone to talk to when shit went wrong. Hinata wasn’t ready for his father to leave so unexpectedly. He wasn’t ready to take on the tear jerking sadness that swallowed him slowly, day and night. It consumed him completely, the ginger having no reason or strength to push through. Everything was just…different. And it came by surprise, he could never have known. He –

Hinata gasped as his fingers grazed the hot metal of the cookie pan, dropping the tray to the floor with a loud thud. That’s right, there was no need to focus on the past. He was better now. He was happier. He had a job, a good life, a mother and little sister who loved him dearly. He was content with how far he had come and how much he overcame. The months of therapy did wonders, and he slowly gained the strength to go out and experience what life had to offer, and he was glad. He leaned down, scraping up the mess of cookies at his feet and tossing them into the trash before starting a new batch, all with a small smile adorning his face.

~

A few weeks had gone by, all as boring and usual as ever. Hinata was scheduled to close today, and he found himself staring at the clock on the wall, counting the seconds that went by. He had finished decorating every cake and pastry in the store, cleaned every corner and wall, prepped everything he needed to last him at least another week. He had nothing more to do than to wait for customers. He tapped his finger on the counter, humming a tune to himself when he heard the familiar ring of the bell, letting him know someone had entered the store. Hinata turned to the customer with a smile before realizing who had just walked in. Even after four years, he could always recognize that raven-black hair and milky white skin. The man was somehow taller than he was in high school, surprisingly, or maybe Hinata just had a shit memory. He stood tall, locking eyes with Hinata, a blank expression clouding his face.

“Kageyama?” Hinata asked quizzically before sending the raven a big smile. The man nodded, his expression unchanged. But that was only the usual Kageyama, always so emotionless, even back then. Hinata gazed at his sharp features and milky complexion, admiring his beauty, because Kageyama was still as handsome as ever, if not more. Hinata must have been staring a bit too long, because the raven seemed to shift awkwardly in his place, only nodding his head to answer the ginger’s question. Hinata cleared his throat, rubbing his hand across the back of his head awkwardly. He never thought he would see Kageyama again, yet here he was, right in front of him in the flesh. 

“It’s been a while. How have you been?” 

Kageyama shrugged, seeming to ease up a little more. Hinata blinked at him. Still the same as ever, he could see. Hinata was not surprised.

“Well, what can I do for you?” Hinata decided not to ask any more unwanted questions and let the man be on his way. Kageyama glanced around at all the treats and desserts, thinking long and hard before replying.

“A cake.”

“What’s the occasion?” Hinata didn’t mean to pry, it just slipped. 

Kageyama glanced back at him, eyebrows slightly raised. He seemed to be deciding on what to say.

“Birthday.”

Hinata giggled. “Please, spare me the details.”

Kageyama rolled his eyes at this. “You’re still as annoying as ever.” The raven mumbled, chewing on his cheek. Hinata felt his body go warm seeing Kageyama ease up to him again, almost like how it used to be between them. He wanted them to be inseparable, just like before. He wanted to be comfortable with him again. Hinata smiled, tucking a few loose orange strands behind his ear. 

“Well? What kind of cake?”

“Chocolate.”

“Boring.”

“Chocolate isn’t boring.”

“Yes it is. How about Red velvet?”

“Fuck no.”

“Lemon?”

“I said chocolate. And you are disgusting.”

Hinata laughed, and he could have imagined it, but he swore he saw Kageyama smile for a second. The two talked a bit about college and what they had been up to. Apparently Kageyama was living in his own apartment up in Washington and had just finished his last semester. He came down to visit for the summer and was staying with his mother a few miles down the road. This came as a shock to Hinata, who had no idea Kageyama’s mother was living so close this whole time. Hinata told Kageyama about his mother and sister, and his current living situation and how he is hoping to move out on his own soon. Hinata briefly mentioned his father leaving, but quickly changed the subject. Kageyama did not pry, and the ginger was thankful. 

After what seemed like an eternity, Kageyama finally got his chocolate cake and was on his way out. But before he could stop himself, Hinata was yelling his name from behind the counter.

“Kageyama!” 

The tall raven turned around swiftly, locking eyes with Hinata in confusion. 

“We should get together for lunch sometime, before you go back.”

Kageyama was silent, but nodded his head in agreement. 

“Is your number still the same?” Hinata asked, remembering when he reached out to no avail. 

“No, I got a new phone a while ago.” 

Relief flooded over Hinata. He wasn’t being ignored, and that made him oddly happy.


	2. Chapter 2

Hinata was ecstatic yet shocked to be in this situation. He would have never guessed something like this would happen, and to him no less. Yet there he was, sitting at a table in a small café across from Kageyama, who was tapping his fingers rhythmically on the tabletop with a blank expression on his face. Hinata scanned the menu, settling on a chicken sandwich. The two ordered and Hinata decided to break the awkward silence since he knew Kageyama wouldn’t.

“So, what do you want to talk about?”

Kageyama shrugged. This was proving to be harder than Hinata thought. The ginger sighed, clicking his tongue in annoyance. “You’re so boring, bakageyama.”

Kageyama’s eyes darted up to meet Hinata’s, a wild look on his face. But then he sent a grin his way, a wicked and familiar grin. Hinata met his gaze, chills shooting down his spine.

“Let’s play volleyball.”

~ ~ ~

The two gobbled up their lunch as fast as possible before taking off. Hinata offered to go grab one of his old balls from home so that they could practice at a nearby park, and Kageyama agreed, driving the two down to the his house.   
When they arrived at the park, it was only a matter of seconds before the two had at it. Hinata watched the raven’s every move as he tossed the ball high into the air, slamming his hand down against it and grinning against the wind. Hinata darted to the side to catch the fast ball, gripping his hands together to hit it in just the right place. The ball shot up, back towards Kageyama and he reached it just in time. The two laughed and jumped and played freely, the crisp cool wind hitting their faces and turning their cheeks numb. Before they knew it, it was dark and the boys had fallen down into the grass side by side, breathless and full of laughter. Hinata turned to face Kageyama, his cheek brushing against the cool grass. But before he could stop himself, the words tumbled out without a second thought.

“I missed you so much.”

Kageyama stared blankly at him, and Hinata winced at his poor choice of words. But just before he could come up with an excuse, Kageyama sent him a small smile. “I missed you too.” He mumbled, turning to face the sky with a flushed face. This sent butterflies through the ginger’s stomach, as much as he’d hate to admit. The two talked some more, pointing at oddly shaped clouds and laughing at each other’s stupid unfunny jokes. They were different from before, yet still exactly the same. Hinata went to point at an oddly bright star, but when the sleeve of his sweater rolled up and revealed his scars, he jumped and pulled it back down in a frantic rush. He changed the subject before Kageyama had time to ask any questions.   
“Swings!” Hinata jumped up, taking off to the playground and sitting down on the cold metal of a swing. He kicked his legs back and forth, pushing himself higher and higher. He heard Kageyama chuckle behind him, a truly foreign sound that Hinata hadn’t gotten used to yet. The raven surprised Hinata further when he offered to push him. The ginger only nodded before he felt Kageyama’s hands brush against his shoulders and push against his back, ever so gently. The feeling of his touch sent Hinata overboard, a surge of electricity crawling through his body. He could never get enough of him. Hinata felt the wind against his face as Kageyama pushed him higher and higher. He closed his eyes with a smile, the air feeling like ice against his cheeks. He was truly happy when Kageyama was with him, and he wasn’t quite sure how he had survived without him for so long. 

After another hour or so, it became seriously cold outside. Hinata began to shiver, bringing his knees up to his chest and chattering his teeth loudly. Kageyama kept his hands in his pockets, his breath coming out as smoke against the night air. 

“We should probably get going.” 

Hinata nodded, standing up and following the tall raven to his car. The ride was quiet, which Hinata didn’t complain about. He was beyond tired and needed sleep. When Kageyama pulled into Hinata’s driveway, the ginger turned to him. 

“I’m off tomorrow, want to go do something again?” 

Kageyama was quiet for a second. “Sure.”   
Hinata smiled. “I’ll text you then?”

He nodded. And with that Hinata closed the car door and practically skipped into his house as his crush drove away.

~ ~ ~

A few weeks had gone by, and Hinata was spending almost all of his free time with Kageyama. They would go out to eat, play volleyball at the park, visit each other’s houses (Hinata’s mother was very ecstatic) and talk about life and the things they wanted to do.   
Today was a dreary rainy day. Hinata gazed out his window from his bed, losing himself in the dull grey skies. To him, this weather was the worst. He felt tired and lazy and unmotivated, although he knew Kageyama would disagree. He loved rainy days. Hinata fell onto his back, smacking his head into the pillows and letting out a sigh. He grabbed his phone and pressed on Kageyama’s contact. 

It rang a while before he heard the familiar low voice. 

“Hello?”

“Can I come over? I’m so bored.”

“Ugh. You’re so annoying. Can’t I enjoy the rain in peace.”

“I’ll be there in a few.”

Hinata hung up with a giggle, cutting off the loud groan from the other end.

Kageyama’s room was messy, as usual. His dirty clothes were sprawled across the floor, his shoes thrown messily around a pile of papers. Hinata made a face.

“Clean your room. So messy.”

Kageyama grabbed a dirty shirt from behind him on the bed and chucked it at the ginger, watching as it landed over his head. 

“You’re one to talk! You can’t keep anything clean to save your life!”

Hinata pulled the shirt off with a laugh, tossing it to the side with the rest of his dirty clothes. 

“So now what?” 

Kageyama scoffed.

“You’re the one who wanted to come over, don’t expect any ideas from me, dumbass.”

Hinata clicked his tongue, deep in thought. 

“Board games?”

“No.”

“Truth or dare?”

“No.”

“Scary stories?”

“What are you five?”

Hinata pouted, letting his breath out in a sigh. Within seconds, his pout formed into a shit eating grin. Kageyama stared at him, furrowing his eyebrows in confusion. Then he knew, and before he could run, Hinata was throwing himself on top of the raven with a scream. The ginger began to tickle Kageyama furiously, the raven kicking and yelling and cursing at him. The two rolled over off the bed like animals, Hinata battling his way on top to hold him down. When he had his arms pinned above his head, he couldn’t control his laughter. Kageyama was hopeless, pinned to the ground underneath the smaller boy. 

“Gotcha!”

Kageyama cursed, trying to kick the ginger off of him, which only made him laugh harder. But then he was staring into the raven’s eyes, the laughter slowly fading. He looked at the colors, the beauty in his eyes, and he felt his heart skip. Kageyama stared back at him, blinking with confusion. Hinata knew he should say it. He wanted to say it. He wanted to tell Kageyama how much he liked him and how he felt. How he’s always felt. He thought about how he would react. Would he feel the same way? Probably not. He would probably be disgusted. But the possibility of Kageyama feeling the same was far too exciting, and before he could stop himself he was leaning into him, closer and closer. Hinata was snapped back to reality when he felt a hand grip tightly around his wrist. He yelped, trying to jerk his arm away with a smart insult, only Kageyama wasn’t listening, He was staring at his arms. Hinata’s eyes shot to where he was looking, where his hand was still gripping tightly. Horror struck Hinata when he realized. His sleeves had ridden up in the struggle, and his white scars were visible. Without warning, Hinata jerked his arm out of Kageyam’s grasp, jumping up to his feet and rolling his sleeves down as fast as he could. Words could not describe this feeling. He wanted to disappear, to run away as fast as he could. He never wanted him to see, he didn’t want Kageyama to see him like that. Like someone who cuts. Someone who can’t handle his feelings and has to bring a blade to his skin to feel okay again. The silence was painful. Kageyama only stood up and stared at the ginger with a worried expression. It was too much. Hinata avoided his gaze, staring behind him at the wall.

“I don’t do it anymore. It was a long time ago.”

Kageyama was quiet. 

“I really don’t do it anymore.”

There was a pause before he spoke. A small pause, when Hinata could see the flash of pain in Kageyama’s eyes and the saddened look on his face. It made his heart sink. 

“Alright.”

Neither of them moved. Silence. Hinata rubbed at his arm and shifted feet awkwardly. 

“I should get going-“

But then he felt arms around him, gripping tightly but gently at the same time. Hinata was shocked. He couldn’t speak a word as the raven rested his head on his shoulder in a deep hug. Kageyama was never one to comfort people, let alone hug someone willingly. Hinata was dumbfounded by this gesture, but found himself leaning into his touch. He was warm, so very warm, and Hinata wanted more. He felt safe in his arms, and he never wanted to move. He let out a breath he didn’t realize he was holding, pressing his forehead against the crook of Kageyama’s neck, and suddenly Kageyama wanted, needed to protect him. To hold him and never let go. To comfort him and let him know how perfect he was. And Hinata needed to feel it.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> These lovebirds are going to be the death of me. Stay tuned


	3. Chapter 3

Hinata wasn’t sure what he was expecting, but it definitely wasn’t this. He never would have imagined himself lying in bed with Kageyama, feeling his hot breath against the side of his neck and his arms draped around his side. Hinata was in disbelief, his heart fluttering so fast he couldn’t possibly sleep. Instead, he stayed silent, staring up at the ceiling of Kageyama’s bedroom in awe. How could this be happening? Hinata’s mind wandered. Seeing his scars must have done a number on Kageyama, because he seemed to have transformed into a whole new person. Or perhaps he awoke something inside of him. Either way, Hinata felt guilty. But as scary as it was, Hinata loved it. He loved every bit of it and didn’t ever want this moment to end. Before thinking properly, the ginger turned so that he was face to face with Kageyama, whom was fast asleep. He didn’t care anymore, it was too much. Feeling his breath on his neck, his arms around him as he slept, holding him close and protecting him. It was too much for Hinata. He wanted Kageyama and nothing could stop him. Besides, Kageyama had to have liked him back if he allowed himself to lay in bed with him, right? He shook every thought from his brain and stared at Kageyama’s soft face, his long eyelashes that gently fluttered as he stirred in his sleep. He closed his eyes, pressing his lips against the raven’s gently but passionately. Kageyama’s lips were unexpectedly soft, and Hinata melted into the feeling. When he pulled away, he met eyes with Kageyama, who was now wide awake. Panic filled Hinata, and he began to studder. 

“I-I-sorry, I didn’t-“

But he was cut off abruptly when Kageyama leaned forward to connect their lips once more, and just like that, Hinata succumbed to the feeling, wrapping his arms around the raven and pulling him closer. In that moment, Hinata felt truly happy. The butterflies in his stomach soared and he allowed himself to disappear in the feeling. He was so unbelievably happy, he didn’t think anything in the world could beat this feeling. Kageyama rolled over with Hinata until he was on top of him, his tongue dancing around the ginger’s mouth feverishly. Hinata moaned into the deep kiss, letting his eyelids flutter open slightly. It was pure bliss, and he needed more. As if answering his prayers, Kageyama’s hand traveled down Hinata’s chest, past his abs and to the hem of his shirt, tugging gently at the fabric. Hinata obliged, breaking their kiss to lift his arms above his head as Kageyama peeled his clothes off frantically. Within seconds, The raven’s lips were crashing against Hinata’s once more, dancing hungrily. Hinata whimpered into the kiss, the feeling becoming too much to handle. He felt Kageyama’s cold fingers tangle with the string of his pajama pants, and before he knew it he was completely naked and on his knees beside the bed in front of Kageyama. He tugged at the taller boy’s pants until they were off, throwing them to the side along with his underwear. Kageyama was bigger than Hinata expected, but this only excited him further. He wrapped his fingers around the length, sliding his tongue around the head in a circular motion. Kageyama clenched his fists at his side and trembled, letting out a small moan under his breath. That was enough for Hinata, and he dipped his head down to swallow the raven whole. His tongue danced around his cock, cheeks hollowed and eyes glazed over with lust. Kageyama whimpered, his toes curling beside Hinata’s head in a frenzy. Hinata only went faster and sucked harder, bobbing his head in time with his hand which pumped at Kageyama’s base. It was too much, and Kageyama’s moans and curses were slipping from his tongue in a struggle. Hinata lifted his head to meet the raven’s eyes, cheeks hollowed, eyelids fluttering and drool dripping from his chin. His face was pink and flushed, skin glowing. Kageyama stared back at him, his heart skipping a beat. He was beautiful. 

Hinata pulled away from his dick with a pop, climbing onto the bed and reconnecting their lips for a kiss. Kageyama complied. After a few moments, Hinata was flipped onto his stomach in front of Kageyama with a little force. 

“Are we – Do you want – “

Kageyama was interrupted by an eager Hinata pushing his ass against his erection with a frantic nod. Kageyama swallowed any words he was about to say, gliding his hand down the ginger’s back and tracing around his entrance playfully. Hinata sucked in a breath, relishing in the feeling. Kageyama reached to his bedside drawer, pulling out a bottle of lube and squeezing a decent amount onto his fingers. He tossed the bottle to the edge of the bed when he was finished and slowly pushed one finger inside Hinata, curling it gently. Hinata gasped, arching his back in surprise and shivering into the blankets. Kageyama took in the scene before him, along with the view, and it excited him further. It wasn’t long before he was able to add another finger, then another, and by then Hinata was a squirming moaning mess beneath him. The raven pumped his fingers in rhythm, curling them and feeling all of Hinata on his fingertips. Hinata let out a gasp suddenly, digging his fingers into the sheets under him.

“R-right there!”

That was all he needed. Kageyama gripped the ginger’s back with one hand, and thrusted his fingers deep inside his with the other, focusing on that tender spot that made Hinata squirm. The room was filled with moans and the sound of the bedframe slamming into the wall with force. Hinata trembled, gasping and arching his back to push himself further against Kageyama’s fingers.

“Ah-ah-fu-Kagey-ama!”

Kageyama pulled his fingers from the ginger, resulting in a whimper from the smaller. But before he could complain, Kageyama aligned himself against his entrance and thrusted deep into him. Hinata’s mind raced, his body trembling with desire and pleasure. Kageyama gripped tightly to Hinata’s waist, his mouth falling open and moans falling from his lips every second. Hinata felt a familiar heat pooling in his stomach, and he wrapped his arms around Kageyama’s neck to pull him down closer against his body. Kageyama thrusted faster, harder, locking eyes with Hinata as he reached him limit. Hinata tightened around the raven, throwing his head back with a loud yell as he trembled and locked his legs around the boy of his dreams. Kageyama came a few seconds later, pumping slowly to ride out his and Hinata’s orgasm. Kageyama collapsed beside Hinata, instinctively wrapping his arms around him and pulling him close. Hinata panted, trying to catch his breath and wiping the sweat from his forehead. 

“I’m gonna be so sore tomorrow.”

Kageyama chuckled, closing his eyes and pressing his lips to the ginger’s forehead.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I rushed hella at the end cause I wasn't feeling this one anymore, I'm sorry! But I hope you enjoyed regardless!
> 
> I'm going to start writing a different AU with these two lovebirds, so be ready!

**Author's Note:**

> I have nothing to say rather than I hope you enjoy this hehe


End file.
